Hey, Y'all!

Unfamiliar Territory

My husband and I dated in college, then broke up for a handful of years before reuniting.  Getting back together was weird. He was the same, I was the same, yet we were both vastly different than we'd been when we'd called it quits.  I remember feeling something I can only describe as "unfamiliar familiarity" when we started dating again. We already knew so much about one another, but had so much more to say, so much more we wanted to experience together. Our rediscovery period was downright blissful.

That's how I felt when I opened the "compose" screen to write this post today.

Five short years ago, my blog was such a huge part of my life.  I posted at least four times a week, dreamed of moving from Blogger to a "real" platform, read dozens of blogs daily, and worked very hard to nuture the relationships I made online, especially with my tight-knit circle of like-minded mom bloggers.  Today, I got a surge of nervousness when I started to write.  The homescreen looked familiar, but my fingers fumbled and screwed up the password the first time I tried to sign in.  I wondered how to start. I typed, deleted, typed again.  I remember why I loved this so much. I'm sad I stopped doing it.

I have spent the past year redifining myself, learning what "normal" means again.  And I'm finally ready to talk about it. Nothing bad has kept me from writing, I've just been thinking a lot, maybe too much. I had forgotten how good it feels to peck out my thoughts on a keyboard and toss it up on the internet for everyone who cares to read it.

I remember now. And I like it.

More To Say

I almost shut my blog down the other day. Seriously.  I usually pay the bill in early March and when it came this year, I didn't pay it. Not until today.  I kept thinking, "What more do I have to say?" So many things are said by so many different people on the interwebs every day, nothing in my head seemed original.  

Then someone from my real life discovered my little space here.  And she liked it.  And she told me.

That was the push I needed.  There's still a lot to say. There always will be.  And I want to say them, to you, to keep for myself to read on a rainy day, to let my son read someday.  I want to talk about food, my family, the world.

This blog is my cook book, my son's baby book, a document of the majority of my marriage, a record of our entire time in Alabama.  How could I ever think of letting it go?  There's a lot more to say.

What's Going Down

My side gig, and a big part of my heart, is coming to an end this week as Food Lush and our sister site, Style Lush, close their virtual doors.  It's been such a great couple of years writing for the site and getting to know the other writers, my Lush Family.  But it's time to move on, on to new adventures.

I'm still enjoying my job and still learning how to live a more slow-paced, calm life. I'm loving the extra time it gives me with Dean and Marcus and I feel great.  I don't think I realized just how fried I was until I had a break. But now I'm preparing 90% of my meals instead of eating 90% of them out, I'm filling my car with gas once a week instead of four times, and I'm sleeping. It's nice.

I have a few blog ideas brewing, some on my own, some with others. I'm excited to re-embrace (is that a word?) my little corner of the web as I get to know this different version of  myself. I hope you'll tag along for the ride.

Life,Well-Lived

Last week, several of us shared our life lists.  This week, we're sharing our proudest achievements in our lives.  Link up and share your own!

So far, in my 35 years, I have:

*Lived alone

*Vacationed alone

*Taken an adults-only trip to Disneyworld with a friend

*Bought a house

*Married the love of  my life

*Had the little boy of my dreams

*Earned a Master of Fine Arts Degree

*Taught at an Ivy League University

*Moved halfway across the country

*Lived in NYC

*Toured a show to a theatre festival in Poland

*Spent 7 weeks doing a show in Alaska

*Gone whale-watching on a boat called The Ultima Thule (Oh, yes, I did. I also threw up on that boat, but I'm less proud of that one)

*Stage managed two Broadway shows

*Held a Tony award

*Made friends with Chris Sarandon (Prince Humperdink from The Princess Bride)

*Learned to bake really, really well

*Owned 2 cats

*Operated countelss power tools

*Toured Washington DC

*Served as matron of honor in my best friend's wedding

*Held my friends' children and watched them hold my son

*Cracked several "secret" recipes from our favorite restaurants

*Been on a dance team

*Joined the Actors' Equity Association

*Won $1,000 on a slot machine

*Started a blog

*Attended 2 blog conferences

*Purchased jeggings

*Drove a box truck (But not a zamboni. Need to add that one to the life list.)

*Hosted the holidays at our house (Thanksgiving and Christmas)

*Had a magazine article published

Link up with your own or put them in the comments!

Project Life List

Way back yonder when I was still on Blogger, I kept my life list in the sidebar of my blog. I liked having it out in the open for me and everyone else to see. I figured if I looked at it long enough, I'd eventually start doing some of the short-term, easy things.  I revisited that list, then took a good, hard look at my life to make the new list below.  I'm very excited to share it as a part of The Life List Project (#LifeList) with some other phenomenal bloggers. Join in with Kelli from Momma Needs A Beer,  Heather from CafeSmom, Andrea from Good Girl Gone Redneck, Starr from Chicago Foodie Girl, Judi from What Would Judi Do?, Sue from Motherhood and Me, Alexia from Babies and Bacon, Vanessa from La Vida Loftus , Alissa from Clever Compass and me.

JEN'S LIFE LIST

Play mini-golf every chance I get.

Conquer my fear of fondant.

Visit Italy and eat myself silly.

Spend my 40th Birthday in NYC.

Be a production stage manager again.

Teach.

 Learn to apply eye makeup really well.

Feed people--their stomachs, their minds, their souls.

Dance at my son's wedding.

Teach my husband how to type correctly.

To meet as many of my blog friends as possible. I have had the pleasure of meeting some of my favorites, like Alissa and Kelli, but several of you remain on my list of people to hug in person. (Bree, Christy, Molly and Eva--I'm lookin' at you!)

Be happy with a calmer life.

Be there when I'm needed.

Take Dean to Disney World. Watch his head explode from happiness.

Take a family road trip with a blog friend and their family. (Or multiple friends!)

Plant flowers that live more than one season.

 

 

 Link up below and be sure to read read all the other fantastic #LifeList posts!

Sit Down

I don't feel well today.  I think the cold my guys had last week has finally hit me.  Fortunately, I don't have to go in to work, so I can sit down. The problem is making myself do just that. But I'm trying.  I have my trusty water cup and my kitty here on the couch with me and we're watching the Price is Right.  For some reason, Heidi Klum is on here wearing hooker boots and "helping" each contestant. That's weird.

Have I told you I'm quitting caffeine? I visited the nephrologist and everything looked good, but there is a new study that shows caffeine aggravating the cysts I have on my kidneys. That was pretty much all I needed to hear.  My doctor was kind and gave me until February to be down to one cup of coffee.  As of yesterday, I'm already there.  I enjoyed one final Dr. Pepper 10 on Monday. It was divine. I'll miss my fizzy friends, but it's a small price to pay if it keeps me healthier.  I am now drinking my one cup of coffee in the morning, then water, water and more water.  I average 96 oz. per day. And I go to the potty a lot.

I've started brainstorming about NaNaBloPop (NaBloPoMo, that is) in November. I'll be knee-deep in rehearsals for CHRISMAS CAROL, but I want to do it. I'm thinking of short posts every day in the spirit of a gratitude journal.  Anyone care to join me?

Friday 5: Top 5 Favorite Shows From Childhood

This week's Friday 5 is a total copycat of Alissa's post, but I really, really liked her list.

Here are my top 5 favorite TV shows from childhood:

Punky Brewster.  I wanted to be her. I looked  a lot like her and even dressed like her from time to time to amuse my elementary school friends.

Knots Landing.  Yes. I watched Knots Landing as a child. I loved that show. LOVED.  My parents let me stay up late on Thursdays to watch it.  They are good parents.

The Cosby Show.  Good, clean fun, hilarity, good lessons. I loved growing up with their kids. One of my favorite episodes is the one where Theo and his friends are listening to the record of MACBETH. Too, too funny.

The Wonder Years.  Kevin was in the same grade as me throughout the series. This was a show I always watched with my family and it's still one of my dad's favorites. We quote it a lot in our family.

The Price Is Right.  My mom and I used to joke that if I'd been home-schooled, the only thing we'd have gotten done would have been watching the Price Is Right. I really liked being home in the summertime and on holidays to watch.  I lived for days when they played Plinko.

Head over to Clever Compass and play along!

 

Friday 5: Apptastic

Today's post is courtesy of Clever Compass.  Each week, Alissa provides a category and a list of 5 things. This week, it's apps.  I LOVE my iPhone and my iPad, so this is an easy one for me.

1.  INSTAGRAM.  Just like Alissa, most of my photos are taken with my phone.  I love Instagram because of how easy the app makes it to share on Facebook and Twitter.  I'm also a sucker for the filters, which can make your photos look really cool.  I like to do Fat Mum Slim's photo a day each month, and I use Instagram to post them and share them.

2.  BEJEWELED.  More a game than an app, I guess, but I adore Bejeweled, especially on my iPad.  I only recently discovered "Diamond Mine" in the game.  Can we say "addicted?"

3.  SCRAMBLE WITH FRIENDS.  I am very good at this game. Like, really, really good. I beat my husband at least twice a day. It's sort of like Boggle. VERY fun.

4.  PANDORA.  I like to listen to music when I cook. I have a good selection of songs on my iTunes, but I'm sometimes in the mood for a particular kind of music. Enter Pandora. I have tons of channels, ranging from INXS to Pink to the Disney Kids Channel.  There's something for every mood and every member of my family.

5.  STARBUCKS.  This app is awesome.  If you have a Starbuck's gift card, you can enter the number (a bit of an annoyingly long process), but then you can pay with your phone and earn stars!  Once you buy one thing, you are at "green level," which entitles you to free milk upgrades (great for me--I use soy) and free shots of syrups, among other perks.  There are different levels. It's easy to reload your card and you get a star for every  transaction.  I have been known to send my phone to Starbuck's with my lovely assistant when we both need a Frappuccino in the middle of the afternoon.

So those are my favorite apps. What are yours?  Go over and link up on Clever Compass!

 

Why Blog?

I've talked before about why I chose blogging as my outlet.  I started blogging right before I found out Dean was on his way and from there, it became a permanent fixture in my life.  I've transitioned over the years from a typical "mommy blogger" into something else.  As Tanis pointed out at Type-A last weekend, if you have a uterus and use it to reproduce, you are tagged a mommy blogger. End of story.   I pretty much agree with her. I'll always use this space to talk about Dean, but he's four now. He's not hitting milestone after milestone and some of the things he says and does just don't have a place on the internet.  He understands privacy now, and I have to respect that.  My husband is also a private person. While he provides me with at least 10 belly laughs a day, most of the things he says are better kept between us.

So why blog?

I do it as an outlet.  I do it as a release.  I do it for the relationships. 

I spent the weekend at Type-A surrounded by people who blog for a myriad of reasons.  We all took sessions and workshops to make us better.  I stretched my brain by attending sessions like "Breaking Into Podcasting," which did the important task of letting me know I do NOT want to break into podcasting. (It's important to know your limits, right?)  The sessions I liked most were "Pitch and Pitchback," which talked about working with brands, and "Blogging Ethics," which will help me in my real life job as much as my online doings. Kelby Carr, who literally wrote the book on Pinterest, and who founded Type-A Con, inspired me with her humor, ease and incredible knowledge.  I talked to a few brands, a couple that I'm excited by the possibility of working with, not necessarily to make bank, but to see how I can incorporate their products and services into my life. 

Blogging, for me, has always and will always be about the relationships.  I rode down from DC (we were visiting our family) to Charlotte with Alissa, one of my all-time favorite blogging friends.  The hours flew by as we talked excitedly about our plans for the conference, our boys, our husbands, our jobs.  We bonded over our mutual adoration of Diet Coke and giggled over stories from our youth.  The hotel was great, a very comfortable place to spend 4 days, save the talking toilet in our room (It made sounds. It was weird.) and the ice-cold shower our first day. (It eventually warmed up, thankfully.) 
There was a Panera right across the street where I could get my hazelnut coffee fix.  We met up with Kelli, who fit right into the dynamic. The three of us had a fantastic time together.  We laughed like 7th graders, talked about very deep life issues, ate fantastic food, danced, and just had some pretty awesome girl time.

Alissa made us "Bmore and Bama t-shirts.  They sparkle.  I love them muchly.

 

I saw people I had never met, some that I had seen at BlogHer, and some who before the weekend were just Twitter avatars.  I'll talk more about the people, the parties and the actual conference later. For now, though, I'm still riding the high of being with my tribe, the people who truly get why we do this.

FACT:  Bloggers LOVE cannoli.

I blog for community.  I blog for myself.  I blog for sanity and clarity and to have my voice heard by someone. 

Why do I blog?  How could I not?

Recharged by Type-A

This weekend was incredible.  I jumped into my assignments as a Type-A Conference volunteer first thing, stuffing swag bags, moving products around, working registration.  I was nervous and excited as I went down to the opening keynote.  I quickly settled in because I was with people that get this part of my life, the part that consists of words written on a screen.  I always feel a little out of my element with bloggers, mostly because I consider myself a hobbyist at this. At a theatre conference, I am very much in my element.  Here?  I was scared I'd feel like a junior varsity athlete who somehow ended up on the varsity bench on a Friday night. So many folks make a living on blogging or have these amazing relationships with all these brands, but that's never been what it's about for me.

I started blogging to belong to a community.  And this weekend, I was with that community.

There is a lot to talk about, and I will talk about all the aspects of the conference and the knowledge I took away from it, but today I want...no, I NEED to tell you about my favorite part.  On Saturday morning, I was fortunate enough to sit in a room while three incredible women, women whose words I've read for years now, reminded each of us why we do this.  In a panel discussion called "We Still Blog," Cecily , Tanis, and Katherine touched my heart in a deep, deep way.  Their presentation was the single-best thing I have ever seen at a conference, blogging or otherwise.  They reminded us that no matter how many hits we get, no matter how many brands are courting us, no matter how many Facebook fans or Twitter followers we have, our words are what's important.  If you care enough to blog, someone cares enough to read it.  Even if you have three followers you don't even know about, that is three people you are touching with your stories, your experiences, your words. 

These three incredible women read their own blog posts aloud to us.  There was not a single dry eye in the room as they shared their hearts, their fears, their joys and triumphs with us.  It was a great reminder that at the end of the day, it all started with a blog. It all comes back to the words and stories and to the people telling them.

I got up from that session with the greatest desire I've ever had to write something. I wanted to immediately get something on this space that would be read by someone, anyone.  I look back at my early blogging days and I remember the people, women like Katherine, Cecily and Tanis, plus so many more, who got me through the dark spots with their humor and understanding, and by just proving that there was someone else out there who got it.  As a parent, I'm on new ground every day, rolling with the punches as their thrown, trying so hard not to "break" my son.  As a woman, I continue to rediscover and reinvent myself.  As an artist, I continue to challenge myself and grow. As a blogger, I continue to wander outside my comfort zone. 

I'm so glad there are others out there in the same boat who get it and know that having a voice to talk about these things matters so much. I"m so glad to be a part of this community.

So I challenge you, as these three ladies challenged us, whether you're a blogger or just a person (hey! we're all people! we win!), remember what you set out to do with your blog or your life and do it.  Tell your story and tell it proudly.  Someone IS listening.