It's the little things

In the fabulous musical COMPANY, Sondheim gives us these lyrics:

It's the little things you do together that make (clap) perfect relationships.

It's so true. 

Saturday night I made dinner, then we got bundled up and headed out shopping. We didn't need much, just a print-out of Marcus's headshot for an audition he had on Sunday and some more Coke and Coke Zero.  We came home, played with Dean, then got ready to put him to bed.  As I was gathering up Stu the monkey and Dean's pants to take them upstairs (yep, still not wearing pants), I said "Oh, I need to put some Coke Zero in the fridge."  Marcus replied "Already did it." I thanked him and kissed him on the head and he said "Thank you for noticing little things like that.  A lot of people wouldn't." 

We talk a lot in our house about how other people do things. Don't get me wrong--we're not necessarily going to change the way we do things just because someone else does them a different way.  Part of it is a character study of sorts.  Theatre people like us are fascinated by human behavior, especially behavior that is vastly different from our own.  I think that's part of the reason I like reading blogs so much--it gives me insight into how other people live and handle situations. We were talking recently about yelling. I had been to the park with Dean that day and watched as a mother of 3 spent the entire time yelling at her kids. And when I say yelling, I mean top of her voice screaming at them for everything from trying to climb up the slide the wrong way to asking for too many sips of water.  Marcus and I are not yellers, never have been.  My mom even mentioned over Christmas that she'd never seen us fight.  We have certainly had our fair share of disagreements, like any couple does, and we bicker from time to time, we just don't choose to yell.  I'm sure there will come a time, probably when we're raising a teenager (especially if he hasn't decided he likes to wear pants by then) when yelling will happen, but for now, we choose to keep even our disagreements a little more low-key.

Wow. I just went off on a tangent about yelling.  So sorry. If you're a yeller, yell away!  Sometimes I wish I was, but I'm just not. I sound like a dork when I yell. I do talk kind of loud, though. Before I go back to my original train of thought, however, I should mention that yelling at referees for bonehead calls during football games OR yelling at teams we don't like (Auburn) is TOTALLY allowed and encouraged in our home. Just sayin'.

Anywho, I DO appreciate the little things Marcus does.  Every morning he pours my coffee for me, always giving me the first cup because I have this thing where I'm convinced the first cup from the pot is better than all the other cups. I know, I'm weird. He loves me anyway. Usually he just shakes his head and mutters "Weirdo"  under his breath and goes with it.  He also makes my grilled cheese sandwiches the way I like them (which is the CORRECT way), even though he is adamantly against eating them this way.  See, I like my grilled cheese squished as flat as it can possibly be squished. I'm talking flat like a sheet of paper. Marcus likes his fluffy and browned juuust right. No. Squish it. I don't care if that means it's browner than it should be, SQUISH IT.  And he does. And he shakes his head while I eat it as if I'm committing some kind of grilled cheese sin. But he loves me anyway. He also lets me open any and all mail addressed to both of us AND most packages addressed to anyone who lives here. Because MAIL IS FUN, people!

I try to do little things for him, too, like giving him a small spoon to eat his soup, even though you're really supposed to use the big ones, leaving him post-its to remind him to take the trash to the street on Thursday nights and never taking the good body wash with me if I'm gone overnight without him.

Are all couples quirky like this?  I hope so.

To balance out all the sappiness, I feel like I should tell you that I do talk at him sternly and roll my eyes a lot when he tracks mud on the carpet or leaves his cereal bowl in the family room and he gets really annoyed when I get the bathroom rug wet after I've showered. Hey, it can't be all sunshine and rainbows, right?

Comments

[J]

Sounds like a good balance to me. You can blame the squished grilled cheese sandwiches on me. I like mine that way, too. (Remind me not to squish Marcus's if I ever make one for him!) ;)

I love y'all. You both bring me lots of joy.

[Hotch Potchery]

Mr. P makes sure my sodas are always cold. He cleans the cat box. He carries all the laundry to the bedroom every time.

I was watching a lady yell at her kids at the movies the other day and it made me feel bad a bit because I am a YELLER. I had NO patience with my kids when they were little, or even now, I go from 0 to YELLING in no time.

Just one thing I wish were different about me.

[Muthering Heights]

It sounds like you have a very harmonious relationship! My husband and I also rarely ever fight. :)

[AJU5's Mom]

We often forget the little things around here. With two little ones, that is where most of our energy is focused these days. But, I may start trying to do little things for him that won't embarrass him!

[rkmama]

You two are so sweet. You'd probably be scared if you hung out with Bill and I. We appear to be in a constant state of bickering but it's just how we talk with each other. It throws people off that we communicate this way and then go in for a hug or kiss. We're, um, strange.
Bill is not a yeller, I am (with adults, not kids), but we are both good about the small things because at the end of a crazy day it can make all the difference when he says "I filled the cat food container" or I say "I unloaded the dishwasher".